2006-7-x Song: Static on the Telly

Written during the summer of 2006, between Freshman and Sophomore years of college in my smoke-filled attic, with the pseudonymous P. Franklestein.  Just a goofy romp of a song, inspired by the likes of the Ramones' Blitzkrieg Bop and Spinal Tap's repertoire.  Meant to be slurred in a cockney-esque British accent.  It would take a real musician to make an actual song.

Here are the lyrics- sound file to follow:

Static on the Telly
There's static
static on the telly
There's nuthin on but I really don't care
My wife is ge-tting in my hair
There's nothin
nothin on the telly

I rise from the sofa to pour my tea,
the water's tepid- Oh silly me!

Put on mah cap to go to the pub,
went to the lou, gave me face a scrub,
went outside, ran into a shrub,
the yard was dark- tripped on some flub.

Hey how now, let's regail!
Polish off plenty pints of ale!
I'll play some lively licks, now that I'm pissered!
That's the dog's bollocks, and I've got 'em by the whiskers!

(SOLO)

Ziggedy zaggedy lines, zippin in and out of my mind,
I look for an image on the screen, but it's nowhere to be seen,
Could something be wrong with my electron beam?

Is there a fox in my box? Is my TV se-et a wre-eck?
I take out the screws and look for clues,
I get bored, so I crank up the juice!

(RIFF: wawaWA wawaWA wawa wa WAWA)

Is it my eyes on these drugs? Sometimes all I see is fuzz,
What's goin on, what IS happ'ning?!
The TV is on, but I can't see a damn thing!

There's static
static on the telly
There's static
static on the telly
There's nothin
nothin on the telly
Static on the telly,
Bangers in my belly.